A busy week for PETA

It’s been a busy week for PETA, the self-appointed animal activist group. There have been numerous animal abuse stories in this week’s headlines. So far, I have seen a few stories that should have PETA pissed by now. 

First, who isn’t familiar with the Michael Vick story? He is the NFL player who pleaded guilty to fighting and killing dogs. He recently completed his federal prison sentence and is waiting to see if any NFL owners will sign him to a contract. 

If and when a professional football team decides to sign Vick, they will have their PR staff ready to deliver a press conference. You will probably hear talk about second chances and forgiveness. Meanwhile, you can bet the PETA army is also ready with their television commercials, billboard and picket signs. 

In Connecticut, authorities broke up a ring of 19 men engaged in fighting canaries. Connecticut authorities confiscated 100 canaries and $8,000 in cash. I didn’t even realize canaries knew how to fight. They are known for their gentle demeanor and not their fighting abilities. Canaries are so gentle that no one is naming their sports team after them anytime soon.

Wasn’t Tweety bird a canary? Maybe he should put on some MMA fighting gear the next time some mangy alley cat tries to eat him. Apparently, canaries are peaceful until another canary crowds their space. And then it becomes no-holds-barred cage fighting. 

And from Richmond, Indiana, it looks like the Round Barn Golf Course will be getting rid of unwanted geese with some hot lead. The geese have damaged the course’s turf and starter pistols and air horns have been ineffective in scaring the ornery critters away. The course has asked City Council to approve hunting. As part of the plan, golfer Lyle Lingenfelter would seek about five hunters to shoot the winged varmints after the course is closed. The plan will give new meaning to the word birdie.

And the worst story of the week comes from South Carolina. It’s a perverted story about a man who loves horses—but not for riding purposes. For the second time, he was caught having sex with the same horse. And to make matters worse, he gave the horse an infection. After his first arrest, he was labeled a sexual offender and ordered to stay away from the stable. I didn’t even realize someone could be a sexual offender for getting intimate with an animal. I thought a sexual offender was an exclusive term for people. 

After finding the stable in disarray, the horse’s owner suspected after hour activity in the stable. After setting up video surveillance, she caught a man sexually abusing her horse. The news article mentions the man has mental issues—really? Tell us something else we didn’t already know. 

PETA will need to start organizing the troops and start protesting in Indiana and wherever Michael Vick becomes employed. I love cats and dogs, but that’s about it when it comes to animals. Although PETA does some fine work, I could never join because I love my steak and BBQ chicken.