Attack of the zombie salesmen

Is it just me or am I losing my mind? Over the past few years I have seen a trend of disturbing commercials. Advertising companies now use the dead to pawn their products. Think I am kidding? I once saw a commercial with Elvis and Dolly Parton rolling down the road in a convertible.

How can Elvis drive a car when he died in 1977? It must be acceptable because John Wayne has dusted off his boots and cowboy hat to sell beer. And the late Fred Astaire now dances with vacuum cleaners. I’m surprised they didn’t ask Ginger Rogers to participate.

What in the name of Redd Foxx’s ghost is happening? Are companies so desperate to push their goods that they can’t find a living person to sell their goods? I don’t mind celebrities selling products for advertisers. I am fine with Michael Jordan promoting underwear because he is alive.

Why hire a zombie salesperson? Do they work for free or do you have to pay them with a juicy lung or a shoulder blade?

What surprises me is that no one finds this odd or am I the only person who finds dead salesmen creepy? Even dead presidents aren’t immune to this nuttiness. Even Greenpeace hired a presidential zombie. I thought it was John McCain until I realized that he isn’t a zombie, he just looks like one.

Greenpeace has brought John Kennedy from the dead for the sake of a marketing campaign. What next? Wilt Chamberlain promoting abstinence or Jim Morrison promoting the next “just say no to drugs” campaign?

If I ever visit a local Sears store and John Belushi tries to sell me a refrigerator, I am gone.